I really like this post. While I have moments of self pity for the "things" i've lost, the peace i've gained is worth far more than the nice things I use to have. Sometimes I have to remind myself of that, like today, when I had to go to the old marital home and see all the work I put in to remodeling what was our home -- it is stunning -- and here I'm living in a little house so tiny and old in comparison. Then he also has the nerve to be so very nice..grrr...I know, its just me. But, all of that said, I comd back to my cozy little house and have no anxiety waiting to see if he drove home drunk again and being thankful he didn't die, or kill someone, or kill our children from drinking/driving. I don't have to sit with an individual who is mentally absent due to alcohol abuse and try to make conversation, or sit in silence with a screaming elephant in the room. Another little blessing, the other house was so big the boys could go hide upstairs; and I don't blame them for doing this, who wants to be around the silent rage and alcoholism. Here, there is no such thing as hiding and we have a lot more interaction because the addict isn't here making the atmosphere too thick to breathe.
Thank you, Pia, for your post. I was having a little pity party this evening. I'm 43, about to be stinking 44, and I'm starting from scratch in almost every way. But there really is, when I sit and think about it for a moment as your post made me do, much to be thankful for and much to look forward to in the future. I couldn't say that before he left me.