Damn, I can see it's all good advice, but soooo not what I was looking to hear.
Welcome to SR, Clueless--I think all of us here felt exactly as you do in the beginning. What we heard was NOT what we wanted to hear at all! But in many cases, the things I least wanted to hear were the things that ended up helping me the most.
(And I didn't start with Al Anon because we were raised to, frankly, despise any religion or belief system.)
Alanon is NOT a religion or belief system. Not at all. I'd suggest visiting their web site and also attending a few meetings to see what it's about. It will cost you nothing but an hour of your time to go to a meeting. I'd suggest you go early and/or stay late to get a chance to talk to some of the folks there on a one-on-one basis about your specific situation.
I ended up as a religion major in college and grad school and have followed my own spiritual journey. But I wasn't surprised to hear my sister refuses to have anything to do with AA because it emphasizes God/religion/belief.
THIS is what you'll find in Alanon as well as in AA--spirituality, not religion. I suspect it may be a better fit than you suspect, altho it can take a couple of tries to find the meeting where you are most at home. LemonGirl just posted about this exact thing on this forum.
If you have some time to read the stickies at the top of the page, you might find that helpful. Here is one that's good to begin with:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...l-problem.html
Please don't feel you're not worthy of being here b/c you don't live w/your sister, or you somehow feel your situation is not "as bad as" those you read about here. Comparison isn't terribly helpful; as you've already seen, there is a whole lot more in common than not. Alanon says they are for "anyone who has been affected by the drinking of someone close to them." SR is the same. No matter the relationship, you belong here if you're looking for help.