Hello Jjj,
Congrats on a being pregnant! I hope you both remain healthy in the coming weeks and months!
I work in academia. Where I work, there are still a lot of cultural issues about pregnancy. Many women still try to work like a man and act like the pregnancy doesn't impact their work whatsoever. There is a lot of talk about shoe-horning kids into a tight window of time. A lot of women take a year of research and pop out a kid! To be fair though, you can't necessarily get pregnant in a set window. Not that I haven't tried it (I was 5 months off)!
So it could be this is the culture this slightly older woman was trying to get you to follow. You were pregnant, but not even your grief should have impacted your promotion. Because old school is that Ginger Rogers saying about she did everything Astaire did - but it in heels and backwards...
This isn't right, but in the path to equality, a lot of women have paid some steep dues and their family or lack thereof may have suffered.