Hey Butterfly
Your well within your rights to ask for a heads up tbh its a funny line with ex's me myself I would definitely have an issue with that & Mrs sw would go ballistic if I had an ex flame out with me on my bday I'm not trying to make you any angrier or upset but for me that ain't on I know some might not have an issue with it but I would & i know mrs sw would too ... I'm not even thinking about at the sheer possibility of what she would do if this was us : (
Boundaries are important in any relationship and I think a calm civilised conversation could be had & if that doesn't work & you want to remain in the relationship would you both consider couples mediation ?