Tetra - there is another way to think of it. Not the man. Ignore him. But your Granny.
I still have my grandma - she is 98 and I am 41. My daughter knows her and she is 5 years old.
We - me and you - are so lucky to have grandma's still.
I know you are younger than me, but there are not many people I know that have grandparents left.
How fabulous that we remember our grandparents too - many people have vague memories of them from when they were very young children or babies.
They have to rely on photo's to remember what they looked like.
They don't have the strong memories we have and the lessons we learnt from these women.
I am happy that I can discuss things about my Grandma with my parents that make us laugh or remember her fondly.
I can make her secret soup recipe thank goodness!
If it thunders, i smile and think will she be hiding under bed as she hated thunder?
When your grandma died, she saw you in such a good, strong place Tetra.
Working, sober, you being a responsible person.
I bet you made her smile a lot over the place you got yourself to.
Its hard. You will miss her. However you have lots to cherish from the time you spent as an adult with her.
The job bit is hard too. I am going through that at the moment.
However, the world does not end without a job.
Mine hasn't.
I've learnt to live on not much money - thats a skill.
Its all experience and life lessons for the next job, or the next part of your life.
Keep going, keep being strong minded and willed.
Remember that your gran is probably watching out for you still.
Try and enjoy the break from work until a new job comes along.
Maybe go see somewhere you have always wanted to see.
Be inventive about making cash - more tutoring maybe?
Wishing you the best xx