MJ,
You are in a great forum to help you stop killing yourself.
I tapered and then quit. Some people get pro help.
I was uneducated on the effects of binge drinking. Now I am educated.
So far 92 days. 1daat. God help me. I am fiercely protective, committed, and steadfast in my resolve to never ever drink another drop of booze for as long as I live.
Strong words.
Hope, try, wish are not terms I use when addressing my sobriety intentions.
Keep reading and googling. That is my experience.
Stay sober, your life depends on it.