Serenidad, I can relate well to having lots of anger especially early on in sobriety. I had rage. It somehow worked it's way out over time. What I found is that behind that anger there was a lot of sadness, disappointment, and grief. There were so many issues in my past and present I had to come to grips with. To come to accept.
Hang in there, and don't give up
You can do this.
As for a drinking spouse, I just can't relate there. You have my sympathies for sure, as I can't imagine how hard that'd be.