I've read through much of it, but I'll look at it again. That will be my lunchtime plan.
What happened: girlfriend bought me beer, I drank it (maybe 7 beers, enough to mess up my sleep and get my heart racing). She did nothing wrong, I've been back and forth in my decision to drink. I seem to have lost my x and y, how to quit the first week or two, while worrying about the long term. I remember how many false starts I had last time, but I didn't expect it to be just as difficult. It is. :-/ sorry for the drama