Hope for you
[QUOTE=Sisteroflove922;5445354]Hopeworks.... Thank you soooo much for you reply. I laughed out loud when you wrote that it flows through like Niagra Falls.. Same with my family. Funny only because it is heartbreaking to look at it otherwise! :-) So, my mother has suggested al-anon to me for years. I am not an alcoholic, but I've always been in denial that I have my own issues due to being in an alcoholic family. Luckily- I have somehow managed to make a good life for myself and am really happy and healthy and functional. But yes, al-anon is on my radar.
Maybe you are right- maybe he does know he is an alcoholic but he doesn't want to deal with it and accept the hard truths of making the change and getting truly sober. It is so painful to watch and see. My mother will NOT let help him anymore. She has already done it time and again and she says, he will not live with her. my husband is at his wit's end. He is being patient but he wants him to leave, TODAY.
When you have the heart to heart talks with your brother, does he act like he even cares? Do you feel like I should do it with my brother and be bluntly honest? Should I only support him if he chooses to get true authentic help and if not; just kick him to the curb? (I feel like this is how people become homeless and destitute- I know it wouldn't be my fault it would be his fault!)
It truly is hard to allow a loved one to fall and live with his/her own consequences. We don't want the A to suffer and so we feel guilty and attempt to help them, keep.them.from alcohol, make them get a job, monitor them, lock up our valuables, etc. But at what price? We can still love the A yet maintain our sanity and a good life for.ourselves. we have the right to a decent.life free of constant worry and stress from.the actions of a substance abuser or alcoholic. Alanon can support you with learning how.to detach with kindness and set boundaries and begin to break free from.the effects of a loved ones drinking.