You just hit your own nail on the head, lady.
No matter WHAT he's going through, there's zero excuse for his turning to drugs, treating you poorly or like you're the problem, etc.
My exAH has no concept of how to take responsibility for himself, either. He continually tries to place the blame elsewhere, ignores his own mental/emotional health, & refuses to do even the littlest things to overcome his own difficulties. He's unemployed & has been for months now. Doesn't use his unemployment income for anything but himself. Etc, etc, etc.
Apparently being a responsible adult is something that many addicts equate with "hardship". To my exAH, because he's "going through" rough times (being unemployed, our marriage being on the rocks, whatever), that means he must be dealing with his issues-because it's SO HARD, right? Things being "hard" automatically equates to being responsible.
Like you, I have just decided that each & every day is an opportunity for me to have a good day. Or a good few hours. Or a good evening. Just sort of...take each day for what it is & keep on truckin'. But don't let your guard down just yet...