Hi, Blessed Love.
Welcome to SR!
Lots of us were at the place of shame related to alcohol overconsumption. Don't let shame bring you down, rather use it as a flashing indicator that something's not right and needs improvement.
You've reached an important starting point - recognizing that you have a problem which is not easy to do.
You can stop. Right now, at the moment, it may seem next to impossible, but take my words along with experience of all other people here who did it - it is possible.
There's tremendous support here - stick with us, and step be step feeling of shame will be gone, replaced by regained self-respect and hope.
Best wishes to you. Keep posting.