Originally Posted by Paddyjnr

No Tomsteve, I drank because i'm pissed off of being me, I drank because i'm a living lie, I drank because because I can't be the spiritual being I confess to be at meetings, I drank because i feel others lie too to keep their sobriety. I am not holier than thou... I am meeee and I'm sick to **** of holding in resentments and pretending everything is ok... it's not and i'm hurting...i'm praying not stop to a God who is non existent just to make me feel better... it's all one big farce, a cult, I just want to die and I dont care about heaven or hell because I've been to both.....