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Old 05-08-2015, 04:47 AM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Paddyjnr
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Ireland
Posts: 34
Originally Posted by tomsteve View Post
Paddy,yer here so sayin ya want to end it all is a lie. What I think ya want to end is what's going on inside.
So, ya say ya worked the steps and hadda sponsor. So I'm gonna assume yer familiar with the big book. Remember what the big book says about resentments?
Here's what I'm thinking- it wasn't boredom and the state of the economy.
I'm thinkin ya stopped practicing the principles of the program in all your affairs.
How bout getting in touch with your sponsor? How bout getting back into
AA? It seemed to work before, why not go back to what was working pretty good?

Life can throw lemons. I wouldn't have thought that 13 months after getting sober I'd be diagnosed stage 3 melanoma, so through 6 surgeries to carve it up, a clinical trial, two rounds of chemo, craptons of tests, end up with some pretty wicked side effects from it all, and also be put on the disabled list.
But it happened and I have stayed sober though it all.

You can get back there!
No Tomsteve, I drank because i'm pissed off of being me, I drank because i'm a living lie, I drank because because I can't be the spiritual being I confess to be at meetings, I drank because i feel others lie too to keep their sobriety. I am not holier than thou... I am meeee and I'm sick to **** of holding in resentments and pretending everything is ok... it's not and i'm hurting...i'm praying not stop to a God who is non existent just to make me feel better... it's all one big farce, a cult, I just want to die and I dont care about heaven or hell because I've been to both.....
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