Hi Virginia,
I have no one to turn to either Virginia, and I agree it's hard to do everything on your own but ... you are now amongst friends on here and you have done the right thing by reaching out. I am on Day 15 of being sober now and for me, this is quite something! I couldn't have done this with regular comments and feedback from my buddies soon here!
We can all make the step if we do things the right way. What that way is may vary from on person to another, but it will be there for you. Coming on here may help you find it.
Best Wishes
C