bad day
I had a tough day. Work has been stressing me out and Im not happy or content with the project they have me working on but they won't switch my project. It has been really frustrating for a long time.
I was complaining about it to my co worker who sits next to me and he gave me some advise that was very direct and blunt. He said I have 3 options. I can come in and punch the clock everyday just to get a paycheck, or I can start learning the new skills I'll need to actually do well on the project I'm on so I can have a chance at getting a bonus check and making money again, or I can look for another job. And he said that I was spoiled, spoiled rotten.
What he said was true and honest but the way he said it... it was sort of loud and I felt like other people might have heard. And it was very blunt and upset me because I know I should look for a different job but im scared to do that cause I don't like leaving what is familiar and going outside my comfort zone. If I get a new job I will have to learn a new job that I don't know how to do yet and I don't know if I'll be good at or not. And I'll have to get used to new co workers. Its a scary thing for me.
I'm just not ready for that change yet. I am dealing with enough new experiences at the moment and I can only take so much change at a time.
I just don't like who I am even when I am sober. Im not happy or content. And I understand what I've heard about alcohol not being our problem. It was our solution to our living problem. But that solution stopped working. So now I am sober and I still have major living problems. I am not good at drinking or being sober.