Originally Posted by
sfs 
I can't live with this forever. I want to have kids, own a house, travel to faraway places, and I cannot/will not do any of those with someone who abuses alcohol and is unwilling to get better.
I convinced her to seek treatment for her depression, but that was after months of trying to break through a wall. A wall is up again, and I have to bust it down somehow.
Thanks for all the support, Internet strangers. I admit I'm kind of using this as a journal so I don't forget anything. I'm a scientist--my instinct is to gather all the data I can.
Yes - and please remember - the choices and actions that you have control over are the choices you make, and the actions you take.
I, and most of the people here, have spent years trying to get our partners to change or change ourselves so that we are somehow OK with the unacceptable situations we are in. It simply does not work.
You do the thing that is right for you. One day at a time.