Originally Posted by HoldingOntoGod

My life is so messy. I'm 35 and getting older by the minute. DH is 40. We are live-in caregivers to my 75 year old parents, one of whom is disabled. We have an 8.5 year old daughter who has been blessed to have a strong male role model in my father. DH was between addictions when dd was conceived. He is now a "functional" alcoholic - holding down an excellent job and being a loving, sweet, good man when he's sober. The only trouble is that he's not sober at home for very long. He gets home from work, spends a few minutes with us, and then goes off to drink and game. When he works a shift that won't let him drink as much, he returns to the gentle, loving man that I married.
I have become fearful of the approaching day that dd and I lose the love and support of my parents and afraid (okay, gut-level terrified) of the emptiness and loneliness. My dad has walked me through so many trials and takes time each day to play with dd. Her daddy loves and adores her, truly, but he prioritizes the drinking. My heart is suggesting that we try to have one more child to dispell some of the emptiness when I lose them. I don't want my dd to be lonely, now or as an adult when I am gone. I have a very strong faith that God will be in control in anything, but is it foolish to have another child when dh is still so addicted?
I plead for the advice of those who walk this road beside me.