Originally Posted by
TennantSmith 
What in the world is it going to take for me to feel as if I deserve it?
Ah yes, this is the big question. I had self-defeating behaviours like you are talking about. I sabotaged myself multiple times when I was trying to stop drinking. And, ultimately, it came down to this - how do I make myself believe that I deserve a good life? It seemed impossible, and yet, I only had to shift my thinking. Yes, I deserve a good life, of course I do, we all do. Believe in yourself.