Different Al-Anon meetings use different formats. The one you describe is typical, but by no means universal. Try different meetings--some will "grab" you more than others--either because of the members or the format.
As for going to AA while drinking, it can possibly help. I've heard people say that going to AA made drinking a lot less appealing, and for some it may finally start to sink in or they will hear someone whose story they especially identify with. It certainly doesn't hurt anything.