for what its worth many times in the begining i was just pushing through knocking down days. I was in a fog not really knowing why i was bothering staying sober cuase well it sucked but so did drinking. I just kept pushing forward hoping that this "better sober life" was really for real and that i'd one day find it. I figured if i didnt i'd just blow my brains out. No big loss either way I figured. I was damned if i do damned if i didnt. I basicly felt utterly screwed.
But in time it got a teeny teeny tiny bit better. I'd look back after a month sober and thought well this still sucks but i guess it is a teeny bit better. and I pushed on for another day then another month etc.. Now I can say life is a lot better being sober. But it was slow go in the begining for me I wont lie.
Hang in there. It does get better.