You know, I have had my own losses while I continued to drink on anyways. At first, its like a goddamn drama and a guy wonders if he'll actually pay the consequences for not quitting, because it hurts more to not drink. And then as things continue to slide into hell, so does all the drama, and soon enough you find yourself waking up in ditches and in parking lots and in hospital emergency rooms. This is the last bit of drama left. Soon enough even that gets old and uncaring. Not much left to do except die drunk or get sober.
I feel for you Marathon. I remember you here at SR last year and you were struggling. I think you're past struggling now. Giving up on living is a real final consequence of chronic alcoholism. There is no cure for this that I'm aware of anyways. Only quitting, and living again can save you. Do it now. One way or the other, you'll quit drinking anyways, if you follow my meaning. Make the right choice here Marathon.