I'm struggling with self forgiveness. I've gotten a lot of pieces but they feel like they are strewn around me and I don't know how to assemble them. I am definitely grateful for the current Deepakand Oprah meditation series on success. It is not about material success at all but more about creativity and self acceptance of mind and body. So I'm going to finish this 21 day program as part of my Step 9 work.
I did not talk to RAH on our drive home on Monday. He surprised me with sex over our trip. It had been many months since we had had sex. I nearly cried I was so desperate for touch. But now a few days later he is very irritated when I approach him even to spend time sitting with him. I'm so tired of rejection. His face winces with irritation and his tone of voice is impatient with me. I am going to sleep in the guest room and just see what unfolds. I am so lonely. I just don't know if this is relationship needs more sacrifice from either of us.