On the other side now and have to say thank you to everyone who was supporting me here. I stopped at the four shots and had a talk with my hubby about how we've GOT to stop this mess. I'm getting sober one way or another and my sobriety isn't contingent on his. I'd love to do it together but I'm very willing to fly solo on this. I'll be looking into finding a therapist that specializes in addiction so I can find the "great why". This morning I got a text from my husband saying the past couple of days (since we've been drinking much less than usual) that he's been feeling pretty good. He definitely doesn't want any more shots and isn't even really sure he wants to drink beer either. All things considered, I think that's a fantastic start.
Sugarbear, there was no driving. That is my hard fast rule anyway, but especially since we got a new car. Thank you for your concern.
As of now there is no alcohol in the house and we both need it to stay that way. Luckily we're going through this while the kids are on spring break so that by the time they get back we can start fresh for them. Thanks again everyone