Building your self-confidence and working on your insecurities either via therapy or a program like al-anon, reading books like Codependent No More all of these actions can only benefit you.
If love could get them sober and keep them that way, there wouldn’t be such a thing called “addiction” and none of us would be here today even discussing it.
In time when the dust clears you will be able to see things more clearly that you cannot see today. Gaining knowledge of alcoholism and addiction can better prepare you for future decisions.
It’s ok to cry, it’s not ok to NOT take care of yourself.