I've gotten away from the "planning around" or "arranging" and I don't believe I "walk on eggshells/best behavior" but that last one is tricky because his sobriety gives me a desire/preference to be more upbeat, cheerful, friendly etc... Not necessarily TO please him, but more because my "best behavior" flows naturally and freely as a CONSEQUENCE OF his sobriety. But I DONT think "oh dear me, I better behave myself or else he'll go back to drinking."
I don't try to keep him away from certain friends, but I do find myself quietly asking, "do you think you'll be tempted to drink?" As he heads out the door. I know this is wrong, but don't we have a right to at least know what to expect when they get home? Rather than be bombarded and sometimes have to switch/ ruin plans spur of the moment because you expected them to return sober? I just want a heads up as in, " if you're planning on drinking, I'll skip the romantic meal/movie night I was planning.