And thank you all! I really love some of these suggestions - especially focusing on my kids and things I love to do - it is pretty warm where I live most of the year, so I am going to start TODAY after work by taking my sweet kids and dogs on a long walk after school. I just need to start focusing on a happier, healthier me and kids.
There are some AlAnon meetings near my office at lunch time - I will try those (it is harder for me to get there in the evenings, since I always have the kids - he doesn't have visitation right now).
I am in the process of taking care of some of the legal stuff - hopefully that will be wrapped up soon.
Thank you all for responding and reaching out. It was really helpful.