Originally Posted by GettingBy
I guess there in lies the problem. I had thought, "Alright you know what this night is going to be. Go to the 8:00 Eastender meeting. Get out... don't sit and dwell." And then the same old thoughts came creeping back in... "I don't want to go. What if he comes home and I'm gone? I'm sure he'll come home early this time." Crap. Self-defeated. Good old denial (mine) creeping back in. Now I'm mad, at myself, because I missed the meeting.
I have missed so many meetings because of my wife and her addiction and her drama. I am working on going to meetings for me and I cant let anything get in the way.
Dont beat your self up though. Learn from it and move on. You cant change the fact that you didnt go to the meeting. Let it go. If you keep beating yourself up, you will start the downward spiral of destructive behavior.
Keep up the positive behavior of looking at yourself and your motives and your needs. Good job.
You are learning and growing.
Thanks
jeff