Seek, I'm right there with you. We will never know what is happening with our children/grandchildren. I too suffer stomach pains when my radar light ups, knowing that something is going down. We have been traumatized and we are always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I only wish I had an answer for you. So many people on here have given me great advice about detaching. I am trying my hardest but it is truly the most difficult thing I've ever had to do. It's totally against my nature. Prayers and good vibes to you.