One more thing I wanted to mention yesterday but I got distracted and it got left out of my post in the end. This links up with part of a comment I read yesterday from heartcore on another thread about therapy, emphasizing that therapy is a
relationship really. It differs quite significantly in this sense from many ordinary doctor-patient scenarios, where the emotional connection between them is typically less intense, important, and relevant.
So in this sense it is also important that both parties involved can experience a host of emotions towards each-other, towards the work being conducted, or feelings pretty much independently derived from the therapeutic relationship but projected into it... a huge amount of dynamic stuff really. It's just that there are defined roles in the relationship, namely that the therapist is the knowledgeable guide whose primary role is to help the patient, while keeping themselves on track so that the process will remain intact and productive. Ideally, anyway.
What comes from the very nature of this type of relationship though is that no one will remain unaffected by it. I would argue that if they do, it's not working well. Therapists are trained to cope with the emotional impact of all this on themselves and normally have experience with this, so roles can remain intact (supposedly). But it's a human-human connection, not with a computer that can just run programs and process data in an impersonal way. Especially if there is prior history working together, like in your case. And sometimes there are glitches in the "programming" (learned methods, coping skills, etc). Everyone is different, but for example in my own case, I've learned that in my experience with therapy so far, what often yields the most powerful and productive outcome is all those interpersonal elements (wherever they come from), and it's not always simply just pink and rosy, or super easy to process. I'm actually just starting with a new therapist in part building on this experience, to take advantage of this using a different approach, more than we did with the previous person I was seeing.
Anyway, I'm just saying all this to emphasize that if you had previous success with your therapist and you feel compelled to work with her again (as you seem to), maybe try not to focus too tightly on this recent reaction of hers. Like others suggested, talk to her and clarify whatever needs to be clarified.
With regard to your comment on her recommendation and your disagreement with it, if you really disagree but have your own ideas, why not bring those ideas into the discussions with her? As an example: say that you like the AVRT method and would like to be able to use it more efficiently in your recovery, but she is not familiar with it. Why not show her and discuss? If you worked with her previously and it was productive, it's likely that she would be able to give you at least some feedback on your choices.
Back to the variety of heavy challenges you are facing and dealing with right now. My heart goes out to you, my friend. But please remember that these are times when many of us are most vulnerable to addictive thinking and actions... so it's always a good idea to strengthen our recovery regime during such periods. I do feel for you in that the idea of bringing in new methods for you just right now may feel overwhelming.
