Wife....you might find this article helpful. "Addiction, Lies and Relationships". written by Floyd P. Garrett. You can find it by doing a google search. You might find the website that it is on ....bma-wellness.com....very informative.
To me, it sounds like it is part of his general denial. also, I don't know, but it may have been his "normal". If that is all he knew...it might be normal for HIM.
In addition, he might feel like you are making a "negative" judgement about his family circumstances and, therefore him, by extension.
These are just possibilities that occur to me as maybe.....
dandylion
***if a person feels some shame or have very low self esteem....any thing, even if true, can seem like a criticism or a put-down to them.
Some people are exquistely sensitive, that way. This is why, I think, that their help or "enlightment" is best to come for any place in the universe, rather than their l oved one (you)....