Your right Jennie that could be good for me. I just have a hard time opening up to someone face to face unlike here, I never did with my ex even. So its unlikely I would open up to a therapist/ I don't know I can picture myself just building walls in my mind, talking absolute boll*x about anything to skirt the real issues as I often have done drunk. I don't know, forever alone? Probably. I'm going to watch the video that haennie posted.