Thank you for sharing, I've been trying to drink in moderation but it never works. If felt wonderful to wake up today and not wonder what happened or feel sick not being able to function. I want to hope that I can control the drinking but taking a chance isn't it worth it anymore. I read someone's post about you could of ended up in prison. It's true and I know one day I could blackout again and attempt to drive. I rather stop then chance it trying to drink just a little to hangout with my friends. Trust me I know exactly how you feel my story literally sounds just like yours. Started drinking at 15 the blackouts followed. Could drink and drink but never threw up but acted like a complete idiot. Would wake up and quickly try to figure out exactly what happened and the shame was horrible. I'm 35 now and I haven't learned how to socially drink. I had an incident just last weekend but I will really try not to drink anymore. I'm a binge drinker on the weekend but at this point I could drink everyday the emotional pain would just as bad whether it was one day or five. That's how I use to try and convince myself I wasn't an alcoholic.