I don't think talking to him is going to help.
I tried to talk to my abuser and it got me NOWHERE. It only left me more empty and broken. I would just silently start taking care of you. No announcement, no explanation.
And he does sound dangerous. Please get things together so that you can leave QUICKLY if you must. I know that sounds like something out of a Lifetime movie, but lets face it, we LIVE a lifetime movie EVERYDAY with these people. We walk on eggshells, we have to account for EVERYTHING we do, we are isolated, we are sad and hurt, we are rejected by people that hurt us anyway...it's a very demeaning cycle that they have put us on.
And if you think that they don't know what they are doing, you are dead wrong. Mine actually admitted that he WAS abusive and knew exactly what he was doing. They know...believe me they know. And they will do anything to keep you low and feeling bad about yourself. They make you question yourself constantly, doubt your instincts, hate what you've become, blame yourself for THEIR behavior...ugh....makes me nauseous just thinking about it.