Bright Side - First off, I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. Thank God you are safe.
Sorry to say it but this one is not even close. You need to cut your losses and get away. I am concerned for your safety. Your husband may be a fine loving person when sober but he is very sick with the disease and violently abusive and you are in great danger if you go back. Are you really willing to live like this forever? And please don't blame yourself - this is not your fault. You deserve better than this and better days will follow if you get out now.