Mikie9

Well, things that are better and help me get through the times I want to hide away again.

The best things, that are often overlooked in early sobriety are:

I eat. It isn't just something I HAVE to do, I enjoy it now. I am a thin guy by nature, but not eating at all was killing me along with the beer and drugs.

I sleep. Even on nights I have trouble sleeping, I awake feeling better than I did after a night of 12 beers and pot.

Exercise. I do so because i have energy again. It isn't something I think about, or "need" to do, I just do. Natural for me now that I think about it.

Restroom happenings. Well I won't go into detail, but things are normal again.

Housekeeping. It just happens now. It isn't something I "do", it isn't an activity. It is just part of my day now.

How I view myself, and others. I am my original self now, in that I am clear headed and can speak/relate to others. I may not be perfect, but at least now I am me.

I get to be bored again. Being bored used to be a trigger, now it is an opportunity to do something, or plan to do something. Before, boredom meant drinking, and then I did nothing. For days and days and days.

Everything is better, and it will keep getting better as long as I wake up rested, have a plan on how to spend my time today, and if nothing else, rest. At 42 years of age after 20+ years of drinking and smoking pot as a hobby, rest is important to me. I am a hyper sort though so it doesn't come up much, but when i get ansy and don't know what to do, I lay down and let it pass.

Oh yeah, and I am funny again. Well I think so anyways I am not drunk, so I don't have to watch my mouth as much anymore, or apologize. Well maybe I should sometimes, nbut I am not mean, some people are just sissies :p

The ultimate best thing about it is, I don't hate myself anymore, and THAT is what has opened up more doors for me than I know what to do with. Challenge accepted