Originally Posted by
br0k3ns0u1 
Cannabis has sucked my motivation away but already things are improving. That drain in motivation has prevented me from achieving my goals, albeit in a fairly trivial way, nonetheless, this has made me somewhat depressed for quite sometime now without me even realising.
I couldn't help but notice that you've chosen to pole vault over or minimize one of your several rationalizations.
All the education and training in the world, all the generous use of scientific lexicon, all the uniqueness you see in yourself...none of this has granted you immunity from self-deception or addiction. The ability to argue oneself into an acceptable position is no great feat. We've all done it.
To end, I think that I am most definetly a unique person, I've had to be. I've made something of myself where others probably couldn't or wouldn't. Where I have come from and what I do makes me a reflective person and that is what you see here. I hope you can see I have a handle on things and that my posts are a reflection of that...
Your argument seems to rest on the notion that, because you started out in life from a difficult place and, in turn, achieved so much more than one might naturally expect, and that you have perfected a personally satisfying version of self-reflection, that you are thereby in a privileged position to manage your use of drugs and, ultimately, that you are better able than most to "have a handle on (these) things."
Addiction doesn't care about how much we know about the structure and function of the brain. It doesn't care about literacy or education. And it doesn't care about professional success or failure. It can't. It doesn't have a heart. Or a brain. For the same reasons, we cannot negotiate with our addictions on any level.
I don't mean to pick on you, but the fact that your denial may be more sophisticated or nuanced than the average addict will not save you. Nor will separating yourself from the rest of the pack. Just as the rest of us are doing, you're dealing with a relentless, progressive and insidious condition that cannot even express indifference to the wants, needs and desires of those of us who are afflicted.
It's been my experience that the more we attempt to distance ourselves from the power of our addictions, the less capable we are of managing them.