jlt33. I understand the intensity of your pain. You are acutely grieving.
You are going to experience this natural process of grieving--just as he will suffer withdrawl and have to go through the detoxing period. There is just NO way around it.
You have my compassion, because we all know how bad this hurts.
Fortunately, it will not always feel like this.
I suggest that you attend alanon, in the meantime--because they will understand your pain and you will recieve a lot of love and support in a way that is beyond words.
I suggest that you proceed as if reuniting is not in the picture. (it probably isn't).
The Universe may have protected you from a great deal of pain down the road--pain worse than what you are experiencing right now.
You can turn him over to God in your mind....and, you can pray for his best welfare.
Please, hang around!!!! You are not alone.
dandylion