I relapsed after having ten and a half months sober. While I was drinking I kept thinking "I'll just have one last (fill in the blank) before I quit again. But I started back to being as bad as I was before I quit the first time so I stopped again. And I never completed drinking through my list of "one last times". And I don't miss it. I never could stop after one. I would drink until it was gone and want more. I've never been able to moderate. So if you want support to quit, we are here.
I was ready when the pain of drinking outweighed the pleasure derived. By the end I was drinking only to keep withdrawal at bay. It wasn't fun anymore and was seriously impacting my life.