Originally Posted by ups_n_downs
Well, I started drinking again. Grrrrrr.
This is not good. But I have a question. For the 17 days that I was sober, I genuinely disliked myself. I felt like a cold bitch who dislikes everybody and doesn't have a warm bone in her body. I felt especially cold and distant from my fiance when talking on the phone. I felt like an emotional zombie and hated it. So is it better to drink and have a heart or not drink and be a dried up husk of a person? I don't know...
K
Hi upsndowns......first off a warm welcome to SoberRecovery, happy you've found us.
So you started to drink again, it's not fun is it? not fun at all, and then the emotional roller coaster, ain't it fun? You get to experience feelings girl, yep feelings, which should be embraced and looked at real good.
Oh yeah huge congrats on putting 17 days together, try it again, this time work on liking yourself, you'd be surprised to see the woman who hides behind the bottle
I don't even know you, but I'll love you till you can.
You ask if it's better to drink and have a heart....or not drink, and be a dried up husk of a person......OHHHHHHHHH you know the answer to that one, don't you?
This drinking business ruins us, I've been battling it for to many years to even think about, I'm sober today, and I want to learn how to deal with the feelings that come with being sober, a lot of years not knowing how to feel what needed to be felt.....anyway that's that.
You have a lot of warm bones in your body, why not stop and take a real good look at them, take a paper and pen, and write them down, you'd be sooooooo surprised at what you'll see.....write down what you don't like while your at it.
Please get yourself back on the wagon again, the sooner the better, it's real hard once we fall off.
Sending possitive thoughts your way....today's a new day, embrace it.
Much love and some big hugs.......Denise