21hope, I have also used alcohol to cope when I didn't want to deal with situations I was unhappy with, so I could tune them out. You need to figure out what is going to make you happy. Alcohol is not a good coping mechanism, doesn't solve anything and makes things worse in the long run.
I think you need to be honest with your husband in that you need some space. Secondly, you may need to take some time for yourself to figure out what you want in terms of your marriage as well as to work on your sobriety.