I'm sorry JEllyn. But I'm sure your therapist told you that you can't "fix him" no matter how much you love him.
He has to choose to stop drinking, and you can't do that for him.
Living with his gas lighting and emotional abuse sounds like it is taking a terrible toll on your mental and physical health.
You do have to decide when you are ready.
One thing to think about though--"being alone" is really what you are now when he's drinking, though, isn't it?
Hugs to you and please keep posting and reading. The stickys at the top of the page have lots of useful information--educating yourself about the disease is a great start.