It's a lot harder to come back from a relapse after some sober time..I think we despair a little more, lose a little of that self belief and the inner addict really pounces on that.
You can do this alyynn - you did this for nearly three months. That's not in dispute, no matter what your head may be telling you.
what you need to work on now is making that limited period of recovery into a permanent one. The first step is putting the bottle down again, clearing your house of booze, and not buying anymore.
Then go find support - and start work on 'Operation Permanency'
D