sparrow15,
I'm divorced from an alcoholic for 7 years, separated 3 years prior. I've been "single" for almost 10 years. Try reading posts at baggagereclaim.com. The articles are amazing and deal with everything from breakups, to dating, to identifying red flags.
I've found that even now, my bent is to try too hard to fix and accept too much responsibility in relationships. Similar to trying to fix my ex-H alcoholism, my son's drug addiction, and my daughter's borderline personaliy.
Being alone is far better than being with someone for the sake of being with someone.
qwer