Originally Posted by
LexieCat 
Training in the dynamics of domestic violence, training in the law around domestic violence, training about the physical and emotional effects of battering (effects and signs of strangulation, why victims stay, why they return, why they don't want to participate in the criminal justice process, etc.), training in the available support and services that are out there to help victims survive and escape the abuse, training in safety planning and lethality assessment, among others.
I have worked in this field since 1999, and currently train police, DV advocates, attorneys and prosecutors, judges, medical professionals, and others. It is a multi-faceted problem and a very, very dangerous one. If you look up statistics on how many victims are ultimately killed by their abusers it is shocking. I recently read that the number-one cause of death for pregnant women is homicide.
you missed the point i was making
i refer to the professionals of domestic violence as the actual people who have suffered with it all
the have personal experiece they have been through to try to help someone else
in al anon there will be plenty of members there who will be just like the op
she loves her man anyone can see that, you can ram facts and figures down anyones throat all you want but you will not turn her away from the love she feels for him
al anon would work with her and let her see things that she just can not see yet
anyone trying to tell anyone that there partner is a bad egg will only be met with resistance as the partner will want to defend
reading some of the posts on here i dont know if there trying to help or trying to dominate her into doing what they want ? that could be classed as abusive or bullying depends on how the op would see it and i hope she can see that people are really only trying to offer out help
try and just be a friend to the girl without trying to tell her how rotten her man is might be a way forward that might just might start a ball rolling
but thats just my 2 cents worth hell what do i know ? only been there done that and got the t shirt but i have no qualifications sadly except real life
good luck to you op and i hope you will give al anon a go as you will find really nice friendly people there who will have been in your postion and will help