Originally Posted by
cynical one 
I think the term “enabling” is misunderstood by some and intentionally maligned by others. When it is said that enabling is doing anything for the addict that they can and should be doing for themselves, I think we now need to qualify that to “Enabling is doing anything that helps the addict continue or escalate their use of drugs AND/OR treats them as if they are incapable or as children”.
Amen.
When I quit enabling my daughter's addiction, she quickly got on the road to recovery. She gets full credit for her successes and failures, just as I do with mine.
Slightly off topic here but I have to brag on her for a minute and this is a good place... We've mostly been DIY kind of people. We don't pay anyone to do what we can and should do for ourselves. Thankfully, it looks like our daughter picked that up, too.
I went over to her house today to drop something off and she was up on the roof. She had quite an audience as she cleaned out her gutters. Her sense of satisfaction was immense and she politely declined my offer of gutter guards.
She really seems to have found herself and it looks like she likes her, too
