Thank you so much everyone. I guess when I'm going through this alone, it's hard to look at it and be like "This is easy to understand". But hearing everyone's responses helps me SO MUCH. so thank you.
I agree that he is only looking for control. That's a big problem he has...and doesn't admit to, so it brings me relief to hear someone say it just from a short explanation of the current situation.
Zoso77 - I agree... it's actually pretty crazy/quite sad if he truly believes this. What's even crazier, is that when I wasn't positive it wasn't his child...before I went to the dr and found out how far along I was, I explained that regardless of whether the baby is his or not, he still needs to prove himself to be a part of the child's life. He told me that if I didn't allow him to see his child he would somehow tell the child the truth, that I didn't allow him in his or her life... because he is a drug addict and liar with anger problems. He said this as if to tell me that the child would be upset and think I was wrong for this. It really does show his lack of self - awareness. I also know that this is probably due to the fact that he has such minimal emotional development in his life. I believe he stopped emotionally developing when he started getting more into the drugs, or even sooner. I agree that the best thing I can do is disengage and leave him out of my life. Thank you for being so blunt about it, and telling me exactly what that means.
Chino- Thank you. This helped a lot. I know that I am super excited about the baby, and most of the time I don't concern myself with the nontraditional way I'm starting my life/family (baby before husband)...but I guess at times I do get worried that this will get in the way of my meeting someone who is as great as your son sounds. It's nice to know that a normal level-headed guy isn't dismissing a relationship with someone simply because she is a single mother.
All in all, a big thanks to everyone on here. I really didn't have anyone to vent to, with the exception of his family members, and that isn't going to help me cut him out of my life... so I was keeping it inside, or questioning whether I should let him know how i feel. Instead, venting to you guys, and gaining some insight, has really helped me. Thanks. I am going to keep trying to be stress free and happy about this, because I know it's a wonderful gift, and a baby chose me to be his or her mom. (the dr says she would bet money its a girl). And I know I'm not gonna make my baby suffer because I decide he/she deserves to be entangled in a web I weaved, due to my own issues/problems with getting too tangled in it.
Thanks <3