Originally Posted by
mavrick 
The most annoying and embarrassing thing is that I have been through a 12 step program.
If you understood the 12 steps, you would never make this statement. The 12 steps are not something you "go through" or "finish". A few choice quotes from the big book:
Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
Step 10 - Alcoholics Anonymous
Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime.
Alcoholics Anonymous p84
The head of the house ought to remember that he is mainly to blame for what befell his home. He can scarcely square the account in his lifetime.
Alcoholics Anonymous p127
So my advice is to get with your sponsor and start working the steps.