Terp - when I'm faced with something like this I stop & think, "Is it
TRUE??"
Really, is it TRUE what they are saying/feeling about you or just their slanted opinions? What helped me to see this clearly was when it happened with someone who I had only just met & had not even had a chance to offend yet.
I stepped back & thought, how could this be MY fault when I've literally done nothing? How is it MY fault that she pre-judged me & is determined to believe that judgment? And why am I wasting MY time trying to sway her opinion? Doesn't that make me as crazy as her? I found myself eventually feeling sorry FOR HER because she's got to be coming from a place of great fear or pain or dysfunction herself to be spreading it around so eagerly.
When I pondered on it more deeply I could really see how we/people do this in all areas of our lives, in all relationships. And when it's someone we do have a personal relationship with, it can be even harder to see the line between the assumptions/judgments we are making & the actual truth because things like emotions & hidden agendas come into play.
It sounds ridiculous, but don't take their dysfunction personally. That's their baggage, not yours.
