Butterfly, I admire you. You are working so hard. You are sharing all of your raw feelings here. You articulate so well. You explain how you are feeling so well. Even though you may not understand it, I think everyone here does.
I have often looked for your threads. I feel like in some ways you have more courage than me. When I come here I find myself wondering how you are doing.
I can't yet put into words how I feel. I can, but it would be lame and choppy and I am not sure I am even ready to put into words what I am feeling. I'm afraid. I haven't felt in years.
Tomorrow will be my 3rd therapy session and it is very painful and uncomfortable and I can FEEL there is a lot there. But it's hard for me to say it all. Or it's easy and I'm just taking very tiny steps, afraid to face whatever is deep inside of me.
But here you are and here you have been chugging along and sharing so much. I wanted to thank you for being so brave and sharing so much with everyone here. It helps me.
I'm all girl power over here, I left my A 'high and dry', I finally had enough, I left, I moved, I got out - but now that the dust has settled and all of the big things are out of the way (court, the move, child support, PFA, etc) I am left with what feels like hundreds of tiny shattered pieces of glass that I have to put back together.
These last few months, you have been doing alot of emotional work. Alot. You can't tell but I can tell by reading and I can also tell because your posts again, are so raw and true and from your gut. I'm going to be there soon and I hope you will be there to remind me that things will get better.
In a wierd way, I am somewhat envious. Not sure if this makes any sense. big hug...