Thanks for the pep talk lillamy , that really helped. I am a very logical person and your explanation if anxiety makes perfect sense. Actually made me feel a little better too!
In the past when I've traveled alone rah has relapsed or binged heavily. He would not call or answer my calls for days leaving me to worry about him, our house, the pets etc. The longer he was uncommunicative the worse I imagined things to be. He's working a pretty awesome recovery program now and has told me if his plans to stay busy while I am gone. I really did not think I was concerned about him but maybe I am having some kind of habitual anxiety. ?? If that's even possible. Maybe traveling alone is a trigger of some kind.